The Best Dating Sites for People with STD’s
Dating can be hard in the first place, and approaching it with an STI certainly doesn’t make it any easier.
It’s one of those things you have to disclose despite there never really being a good time for it. In fact, the idea of breaking down your own walls and sharing something so sensitive, not to mention something that inevitably comes with a backstory, may make dating seem difficult or even impossible.
Luckily, the Internet breaks down some of the self and society-imposed barriers that come along with dating with STDS like herpes and HIV, providing a transparent medium to interact and get to know others without so much worry about ignorant judgment or responses.
When you discover the world of online dating for people with herpes, you’ll find that the comfort and security of being behind a screen allows you to easily open up about your specific condition, and be upfront and blunt more effortlessly than you are likely to be face-to-face.
The virus becomes less important and who you are as an individual —your personality, quirks, likes and dislikes — are elevated.
The sites below, catered to those with STDs, provide a communal feeling for its users. Just being on them may do wonders to increase your confidence in offline dating, too.
More importantly, niche sites designed for people with herpes streamline the process of getting over the STD-talk road bump, allowing for fun, meaningful connections with others while remaining both safe and honest.
When it comes down to it, if you have the virus, there’s really no reason not to explore such sites. Go ahead and save yourself some time in your dating life as you read on to discover the best dating sites for people with herpes.
HIV People Meet
HIV People Meet understands that having an STD doesn’t mean you can, or shouldn’t, find love. This free dating site allows you to find other singles going through similar situations.
By joining HIV People Meet, you have access to a live dating advisor and other support services. The website also provides information on local support events and offers successful dating tips.
Debatably the most well-known dating site for people with STDs, Positive Singles has an impressive 1.5 million membership base and counting.
The dating site may be so attractive to individuals because it focuses on matching you not just based on your medical condition, but based on other, more standard compatibility factors such as your interests, lifestyle preferences, and even star sign.
Beyond the non-bias matching system, Positive Singles has a host of other features some casual hookup sites don’t.
Positive Singles provides both transparency and privacy, with highlights such as the ability to see who has viewed your profile, the option to browse anonymously, detailed privacy settings that allow you to hide your profile based on a specific set of rules you create, a setting to hide areas of your profile (including the type of STD you have), and even the option to require a special password to open the app on your mobile phone.
It also goes above and beyond to provide an immersive online dating experience complete with a 15-question profile section listing your answers, as well as the answers you’d like your match to have.
There are also profile verification options, a Tinder-style swiping section, and even free one-on-one dating advisors — which usually alone cost more than any standard dating site membership.
While it doesn’t constantly remind you that you are on a niche dating site (in a good way), it does provide some helpful resources and support including a care location directory, Q&A section, forums, and more.
Poz.com is dedicated to helping HIV-positive individuals. In addition to offering community forums, mentoring, and medical information, Poz.com also has its own dating community.
A basic POZ Personals membership is free and allows you to see other members’ profiles, share up to five photos, and track who has looked at your profile. A paid premium membership places your profile above other matches and allows you to save your favorite searches.
POZ Personals frequently features advice from members going through various stages of dating.
MPwH, which stands for ‘Meet People With Herpes,’ claims to be the original dating site for people with the virus. The inviting site is available for members with all sorts of relationships statuses, including those who are married and in a committed relationship, but is restricted for people only with HSV-1 or HSV-2.
Profiles list what type of the virus you have, but it’s only a small field amongst over 25 other profile fields, including multiple choice and open ended questions. There’s also a reassuring profile verification option, along with a handful of privacy settings you can customize to your liking.
The herpes-only dating site feels and works much more like a traditional dating site, and is filled with an abundance of features that allow your personality to dominate your online presence.
Video introductions and private albums allow you to make your experience on the site truly unique. You can sign up for a free membership and use about half of the features on the site, or upgrade to a paid membership to unlock over 30 additional features.
It’s not a big issue if you don’t pay, but if you want to really get detailed in your searching or see others’ interest in you, such as who liked your profile, the upgraded membership is worth the price tag.
HIV and Single
HIV and Single provides forums and resources for staying up-to-date on the latest in HIV research and treatment. Its mission is to help HIV-positive individuals find love without judgment.
In your standard membership, you can create a profile, add an unlimited number of photos, and upload video and audio clips. A premium membership gives you the ability to contact other members, send and receive text messages, and participate in community forums.
The site also provides dating safety tips for those who are new to or apprehensive about online dating.
H-Mates is dedicated to connecting people with STDs for anything from friendships to serious dating. The site has a rather detailed sign-up form that looks much like one from its founding date of 2004.
It has all the features of a basic dating site and operates just like one. There isn’t a ton going on behind the scenes here, with H-Mates providing more of a supportive online community where real connections can be formed.
The site is not solely dedicated to people with herpes, but there is a profile field that lets you select the types of members you are looking to meet based on the type of STD(s) they have.
The options for self expression are impressive here, with the ability to upload an unlimited number of profile pictures (and a video introduction).
You can browse and search to discover others, but there are a few other matchmaking features available after answering various types of questionnaires.
You also get all the typical online dating ways of interacting, and even some rather unique ones, such as sending virtual kisses. The niche site doesn’t have the most modern interface or advanced matching algorithm, but it is 100 percent free to use.
Going along with the ‘supportive’ theme of the site, H-Mates does accept donations, giving you access to premium features. With no paid membership, it somewhat equals the playing field for all members.
A site for dating as well as finding companionship or emotional support, HIV Passions is a free online dating and social networking site for HIV-positive singles. You can create a new profile or register with Facebook to start finding and accessing your top matches.
Besides matching singles, the site also includes chat rooms, forums and blogs, video channels, and book reviews.
This herpes dating site has been around for over a decade and is one of the most popular ones in the United Kingdom. If you aren’t from the UK, no problem, you can still sign up but unfortunately, members from outside the UK are not as active. It’s easy enough for people who are not from the UK to connect and chat but logistically it might be difficult to meet up.
The fact that Date Positive is location specific is one of the major points of criticism that people have for this particular website. Otherwise, it seems really great! Signing up is simple and Date Positive does everything it can to actively protect member information.
Its security features and user-friendliness make this website a great choice.
One of the best things about Herpes Passions is that this herpes dating site is absolutely free. That fact alone sets it apart from others that require a monthly or even yearly membership in order to use all of the features.
This online dating platform has a free chat section and you can use it as a place to connect with others platonically or for romance. Herpes Passions prides itself on totally protecting all of your online user information, so you can browse and connect with privacy.
It really vets its members and makes sure that all of your data is secure. Herpes Passions a great choice for people who really need to be anonymous and want to be protected from having their herpes status leaked.
Volttage.com is the first website created exclusively for gay and bisexual adult men who are HIV-positive or HIV-friendly. Model, “Project Runway” contestant, and AIDS activist Jack Mackenroth created the stigma-free site.
More than just a dating site, Volttage is a full social network with HIV-related news, health information, and a complementary blog called Volttage Buzz.
Hzone is the No. 1 HIV dating app for HIV singles. It uses location-based technology to find matches in your area. With a simple swipe, you can anonymously like (or pass) on potential matches and send direct messages.
And because it’s password-protected, you know that you’re the only one accessing your profile.
Safety Tips for Dating with STDs
Just because you’re on a positive-inclusive dating site doesn’t mean you shouldn’t take extra care. To make sure you stay safe while creating connections, keep these in mind:
Disclose your status.
If your partner doesn’t know, you may wish to disclose this information on your first date. Or, you may prefer to wait until you know the relationship has potential. Either way, make sure to tell them before any sexual contact.
Practice safe sex.
Using protection is vital, even if you and your partner are both HIV-positive. Doing so will protect you from contracting STDs, which can lower your CD4 count and cause other complications. Also, having unprotected sex puts you at risk for contracting another strain of HIV.
It’s easy to protect yourself from most sexually transmitted infections by using condoms religiously, but with herpes, for example, it’s a bit trickier. Asymptomatic skin shedding can occur during any skin-to-skin contact around the genitals and transmit the virus, although there are now anti-virals on the market that greatly reduce this risk.
Get Tested Often
Whether you’re dating someone who has an STD or not, it’s always good to be vigilant about getting tested. However, when you know you could be exposed to a virus on the regs, it’s even more reason to hit up the clinic and take stock in your sexual health.
Don’t STD Shame
There may be days when your partner is having an outbreak or feeling weak or depressed about their condition, and you really want to have sex but they’re in no mood for it. Understanding the emotional component of a chronic STD is just as important as recognizing the physical symptoms.
It should go without saying, but having a sexually transmitted infection doesn’t mean you’re “dirty” or “slutty” or any sex negative word you can use to describe a person. Assuming anything about someone’s sexual history or future sexual behavior based on their status is never a good idea, because there is no one kind of person who has an STD.
Enjoy the Freedom to Date
An STD diagnosis shouldn’t stop you from finding love. However, it pays to be careful not just on STD dating sites, but with online dating in general. Keep the tips above in mind and enjoy your journey to romance!